In this episode I chat with Katelin about what it’s like to be the single mom of two daughters only 14 months apart by two different fathers. She shares the struggles that she faces with her own self-image and how she has overcome some things that people, including one of the fathers, has said to her.*
At 18, Katelin met the guy who would later become her oldest daughter’s dad. He didn’t know what he really wanted at the time and they broke up for a year. They did get back together after that and Katelin got pregnant for a third time, shortly after. The first two pregnancies ended in miscarriage. At 6 months pregnant, he woke up and left the house and Katelin didn’t hear from him for days. When she finally found him, she realized that he wasn’t cut out for what was to come. They were off and on, but more off than on. Katelin struggled with being left at 6 months pregnant and continued to do everything on her own.
When it came time to have the baby, he didn’t answer any of her calls, so Katelin’s friend called him and he answered. They went to get him and he slept most of the time. He did wake up when it was time to push and was good afterward. A month after the baby was born, he had a new girlfriend and was wanting to take the baby around her. Katelin didn’t agree with that so he didn’t see her much. Things have gotten better over time though, Katelin says.
Katelin was in the line at one of her friend’s wedding and ended up dating the guy she walked with. Her baby was 4.5 months pregnant and Katelin found herself pregnant again. This dad was great through the pregnancy and was okay with everything, but got more controlling over time. He didn’t want Katelin talking to her oldest daughter’s dad at all – it all needed to go through him. She complied. In the end, they did break up. At that time, he was verbally and mentally abusive – telling Katelin that she needed to be skinny and would point out girls that were smaller than her, even after kids. He would tell her that no one would want her because she has two babies with two different guys. When you hear those things enough, you start to believe it. Katelin has had to re-train herself to not think like that.
Next we talked about what it’s like having babies 14 months apart. She shares the struggles that come with mom guilt, going to the store with one kid on each hip, getting them to sleep, when one struggles while the other is being held, etc.
Listen to the full episode for all the details.
*Please note: this is the guest’s story. Their story is how they perceive it. It is not my judgement or responsibility to determine whether or not this story and the things said are true. Please be open minded when listening to/reading these stories.
LINKS TO THINGS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
-Katelin’s favorite book: The Crank series by Ellen Hopkins
-Katelin’s favorite product: Coconut oil
-My ending song recommendation: Don’t Wake Me Up by Big & Rich (listen on the Hard Knocks playlist on Spotify)
“A hungry stomach, an empty pocket and a broken heart can teach the best lessons of life.”
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